If you’re already thinking about divorce, you’re probably in a situation where you have to make a very difficult decision.
On one hand, you may be afraid of wreaking havoc on your relationship and losing all that you have invested in it. Perhaps you’re even afraid that divorce would be a huge mistake. On the other hand, something has obviously led you to consider legal separation – perhaps you and your spouse have grown apart, are lacking intimacy, or are dealing with major marital issues such as infidelity.
Here are some important personal and legal questions to ponder on to help you decide on divorce.
Should I Divorce? 5 Personal Matters To Examine
Have I made every effort I can to save the marriage?
Many difficulties in marriage can be overcome through open-minded solutions. Depending on your situation, this can mean many things. It can be as simple as discussing the issue with your spouse or changing a simple habit. Or it can mean enlisting professional help such as in individual therapy or in couple counseling.
If you know within yourself that you have done everything in your power to keep your marriage, but it still seems to be hopeless, that’s a big sign towards divorce.
Would I be better off without my spouse?
Your personal wellbeing is paramount, though it’s common to lose sight of that while being committed in a relationship. Now is the time to assess how you yourself are doing while being married to your spouse. Have you had to give up essential things such as happiness, safety, health, and personal goals? Would divorcing mean that you would live a fulfilling life?
Am I only staying for the kids?
Sadly, so many couples stay in ruined marriages only because they have children. The truth is that keeping an unhealthy marriage would be more adverse for children, as this teaches them the wrong things about love and relationships. In addition, a household that’s constantly filled with animosity would be worse for a child’s emotional health than a separated yet harmonious arrangement between parents.
Am I only staying because divorce sounds difficult?
Another bad reason to keep a marriage is because separating seems expensive or controversial, or because you don’t think you can do better. It’s true that divorce is a life-changing episode. But it’s also unhealthy for you to stay in a damaged relationship just because you’re afraid of turning your life around. For many individuals, this upheaval has turned out to be a gateway to a more satisfying life.
Am I ready for life after separation?
All this said, it’s crucial to think about your potential post-divorce life. Would you be emotionally ready? Are you prepared to take on the responsibilities that your spouse has typically taken on? Do you have a vision or a plan on how to take care of yourself after separating from someone you’ve been in a relationship with?
In addition to these personal questions, you’ll also want to ponder divorce from a legal perspective. Legal issues commonly cause expensive and time-consuming disputes among couples, so ensure that you are prepared in this aspect before making a decision.
Should I Divorce? 3 Legal Matters To Examine
Am I financially stable by myself?
Think about your own income, expenses, and assets. Are you at a point where you are financially secure? If not, you’ll first want to take steps to land on solid financial ground of your own. If you have considerable personal assets, make sure they are legally protected and separate from marital property. Also consider the expenses and taxes associated with divorce, as these may not come cheap.
Have I prepared for my children’s future?
One of the most concrete ways to protect your children, regardless of how your marriage pans out, is to engage in estate planning. Making a will is an essential example of this. When considering a divorce, make sure your will and other estate planning documents are updated particularly for your kids.
Have we considered other separation options?
Divorce may be on your mind, but there are other options that may be available to you and your spouse. You may consider alternative procedures such as collaborative divorce and divorce mediation. Educate yourself on your legal options before taking steps towards traditional divorce.
If you have any concerns at all regarding legal separation in Colorado, please don’t hesitate to talk to a family law attorney about it. The legal proficiency of your lawyer can best guide you in this colossal decision in your life.